Lately, I’ve been approached by a lot of people who have never been in therapy before. Many are under the misguided impression that therapists are somehow exempt from the same day-to-day challenges, disappointments, screw-ups, and set-backs that plague mere mortals. Truth be told, when I feel the anguish and humiliation of falling face first into an all-too-familiar puddle, I hear myself saying the same thing, “Debbie, you’re a therapist, you should know better.”
Well, here’s a newsflash for you: Therapists, coaches, teachers, psychologists, social workers, doctors, lawyers, and others in helping professions are as fallible as you. Shocking though it may seem, we get personally involved in our own lives, sometimes lose the very objectivity that serves our clients so well, and we make mistakes, embarrass ourselves, are clumsy, naïve, stupid, and sometimes worse. Hopefully, like the smartest among you, when we find ourselves stuck in quicksand, we will seek helping hands.
I hate to admit it, but it’s true. I recently had one of those dreaded “opportunities” to learn something unsettling about myself. After kicking myself around the block a few times, I sought the assistance of a clear-thinking colleague. The work I needed to do was challenging and necessary. And if I did it well enough, I shouldn’t need to fall into the same puddle yet again. Hopefully, I am now free to find new and different ways to embarrass and humiliate myself!
Like Elphaba in the musical Wicked, I heard myself lament, “I’m limited” and, like her, felt twinges of “self-loathing.” Fortunately, the words of Galinda comforted me:
“I’ve heard it said that people come into our lives for a reason, bringing something we must learn, and we are led to those who help us most to grow if we let them.”
When you come face-to-face with self-limiting beliefs, or experience the anguish of self-loathing, or find yourself stuck in a rut, please give yourself permission to reach out to the helping hands of a trustworthy advisor. You need not stay stuck in that puddle if you “lead yourself to those who will help you most to grow, and you let them.”
You are welcome to call Debbie to schedule a consultation with her for therapy/coaching in Valencia at 661-259-5986 or Encino at 818-385-0550.