Often in high conflict divorces and custody battles, one parent will accuse the other of alienating the child from the other parent. More specifically, the parent believes he or she is a victim of “Parental Alienation Syndrome” or PAS. But, what really is “Parental Alienation Syndrome” and how do you recognize if you or another parent have exhibited some of the characteristics associated with the alienating process?
Parental Alienation Syndrome is defined by Dr. Reena Sommer, an expert in the PAS, as “the deliberate attempt by one parent (and/or guardian/significant other) to distance his/her children from the other parent and in doing so, the parent engages the children in the process of destroying the affection ties and familial bonds that once existed.”
Common features of PAS as described by the late Dr. Richard Gardner who recognized and developed the criteria associated with the Syndrome are as follows:
• Alienating parents makes explicit and/or implicit disparaging remarks about the other parent. Example of Explicit: “Mom left us because she doesn’t care about us anymore.” Example of Implicit: “I can’t afford to send you to ballet class anymore because Mom doesn’t know that you enjoy it.”
• Alienating parent discusses with the children the circumstances under which the marriage broke down and blames the targeted parent for the failure of the marriage
• Alienating parent involves and/or discusses with the children the divorce proceedings, ongoing financial problems, and conflict, which result after the breakup of the marriage.
• Alienated children learn that in order to please the alienating parent, they must dislike or pretend to dislike the targeted parent.
• The “victim” of PAS is not the alienating or the targeted parent, but the child. It is the child who is not only deprived of a relationship with one of his or her parents, but is the innocent caught in the middle.
• It is also important to note that while some courts recognize PAS as part of a child custody and/or visitation determination in the United States, it is not widely accepted by the scholarly community. Thus, evidence of PAS is often inadmissible in court.
For more information about annulments and other family law matters, contact the Reape-Rickett Law Firm at 661-288-1000. They are located at 23929 West Valencia Boulevard, Suite 404 in Valencia.