Table manners play an important part in making a favorable impression. They are visible signals of the state of our manners and therefore are essential to professional success. The point of etiquette rules is to make you feel comfortable – not uncomfortable.
Restaurant reservations are like any other appointment. If you make a reservation, stick to it. Call ahead if you’re going to be more than 15 minutes late, and cancel as far in advance as possible if your plans change so that someone else can get a table. Some restaurants take credit card numbers to hold reservations and charge no-show fees.
1. Unfold your napkin and place it on your lap within 1 minute of sitting at the table to dine. When you are finished with your dinner, place it loosely on the table, not on the plate and never on your chair.
2. Keep elbows off the table. Keep your left hand in your lap unless you are using it.
3. Do not talk with your mouth full. Chew with your mouth closed.
Guests should do their best to mingle and make light conversation with everyone. Do not talk excessively loud. Give others equal opportunities for conversation. Talk about cheerful, pleasant things at the table.
4. Don’t clean up spills with your own napkin and don’t touch items that have dropped on the floor. You can use your napkin to protect yourself from spills. Then, simply and politely ask your server to clean up and to bring you a replacement for the soiled napkin or dirty utensil.
5. Loud eating noises such as slurping and burping are very impolite. The number one sin of dinner table etiquette!
6. Do not blow your nose at the dinner table. Excuse yourself to visit the restroom. Wash your hands before returning to the dining room. If you cough, cover your mouth with your napkin to stop the spread of germs and muffle the noise. If your cough becomes unmanageable, excuse yourself to visit the restroom. Wash your hands before returning to the dining room.
7. Turn off your cell phone or switch it to silent or vibrate mode before sitting down to eat, and leave it in your pocket or purse. It is impolite to answer a phone during dinner. If you must make or take a call, excuse yourself from the table and step outside of the restaurant.
8. Do not use a toothpick or apply makeup at the table.
9. Say, “Excuse me,” or “I’ll be right back,” before leaving the table. Do not say that you are going to the restroom.
10. Whenever a woman leaves the table or returns to sit, all men seated with her should stand up.
11. Do not push your dishes away from you or stack them for the waiter when you are finished. Leave plates and glasses where they are.
12. Once used, your utensils, including the handles, must not touch the table again. Always rest forks, knives, and spoons on the side of your plate or in the bowl. When you are finished with a course, place your utensils (silverware) used on your place in the 4:20 position.
13. Never turn a wine glass upside down to decline wine. It is more polite to let the wine be poured and not draw attention. Otherwise, hold your hand over the wine glass to signal that you don’t want any wine.
14. Hold your wine glass by the stem, not the rim.
15. Where a different wine is served with each course, it is quite acceptable to not finish each glass of wine poured.
And as your meal ends, always assume that if you’re dining in a group of more than six people (three couples), that the check is going to be divided evenly among everyone. Or, if you know you are going to ask for a separate checks, tell the server before you order so that the process is simplified later. Also take into account any significant ($15 or more) price differences in orders. If someone only orders soup and everyone else orders two to three courses, it’s not fair to make them pay the same. Alcohol is another item to consider. If there are a couple of people that do not drinking alcohol while the rest of the group is, separate the beverage total to take this into account and don’t overcharge the non-drinkers.