You may not be aware, but divorce coaching is an essential part of your divorce. Our office offers divorce coaching for those in need and/or open to learning ways to navigate a road that as an attorney for over 17 years, I have traveled and learned myself.
As an example of our divorce coaching I will be sharing advice we give our clients (obviously condensed) to help define what our office offers when it comes to divorce coaching.
Breaking the news of your divorce to your children:
• Write out the rules: This is not a talk that should be ad-libbed. Work out some ground rules before you bring in the kids. Agree on what you’re going to say and how. Agree that neither of you will blame the other, you won’t fight with each other and you won’t pressure the kids to choose sides.
• Schedule it: There’s no way to tell exactly how much time you’ll need, but block out at least an hour so the kids will have plenty of space to react and ask questions. Don’t do it right before bedtime, in the car on the way to an event or school.
• Think like a child. What you say and what your kids hear may not be the same thing. Tell them directly that it has nothing to do with them. Reassure them that even though mom and dad won’t be living together anymore, neither of you will ever stop loving them.
• Maintain routines: if possible, keep them enrolled at the same school, encourage playdates with the same friends, drive them to the same after-school activities and sports and so on.
• Include a support system: Tell anyone else who needs to know, including teachers, babysitters and friends’ parents. Let them know what’s happening and ask them to tell you if they see any unusual behavior.
• Be honest: It’s all right letting your kids see that you’re sad about the breakup, however, don’t put them in a position of having to comfort you. It’s your job to comfort them.
The Law Office of Steven B. Chroman was recently recognized by the Los Angeles Business Journal for the Corporate Citizens Award and The San Fernando Valley Journal for the Trusted Advisor Award. For more information and a complimentary consultation for divorce and divorce coaching, custody, support, pre and post nups, contact the Law Office of Steven B. Chroman, P.C. at 661-255- 1800 or visit us at www.chromanlaw.com.