Promoting your child’s communication skills is the single most effective means of improving behaviors, play, and socialization. Children who can communicate their needs, wants, likes, and dislikes, are much less likely to cry, scream, or protest. While most parents recognize the value of promoting communication skills, many are unaware of the multitude of ways to shape these skills long before children use intelligible speech.
Communication is so much more than the sounds and words we use. Coordinated eye gaze, facial expressions, gestures, and postures are all integral aspects of communication and lay the foundation for the vocal parts of communication that follow. Long before the use of words, children learn that they can influence others, share in experiences, and meet their needs through the use of sounds, expressions, and gestures.
To improve communication skills, begin by shaping the natural gestures that kids use and transforming them into communicative gestures. Begin an activity with your child that involves a motor component. For instance, offer them a desired object but hold it slightly out of reach so that your child has to extend their hand to grab for it. It is important to wait for the child to initiate communication in any shape or form (i.e. reaching, vocalizing, smiling, making eye contact with you, etc.), and to avoid guessing the child’s wants and rushing to fulfillment. As soon as you seen a communicative overture, such as a smile along with eye contact, treat it as if your child just told you exactly what they wanted, and give it to them along with an enthusiastic narration. For example, if your child smiles and looks at you when you tickle his or her feet, hold your fingers up in anticipation, wait for the smile and eye contact before you give another tickle. As soon as you see the signs of communication, excitedly verbalize “more tickles!” or just “more” and proceed to give them what they have “asked for.”
As we reinforce each instance of a child initiating communication, we are strengthening their understanding of the power of this communication to meet their needs. Waiting for a child to communicate a need, and suppressing the desire to rush in and give them exactly what we know they want, teaches them the fundamentals to get their needs met no matter where or with whom they are interacting.
Call Debbie to schedule a consultation with her for therapy/coaching in Valencia at 661-259-5986 or Encino at 818-385-0550.