Raising a Confident Child
A confident, self-assured child is a child that tries new activities and tries again when they fail. They know they can’t be good at everything and are willing to try and try again when something is difficult. Confidence is not an inherited trait, but a quality that we can help to nurture. Here are just a few ways you can help your child develop a can-do attitude:
1. Be confident yourself. Children are always watching and you are their first teacher. If you are experiencing depression, anxiety, or low self-esteem, these problems can affect your child. Seek help if you need to and be careful about what you say about yourself in front of your child.
2. Create routine. Routines and clear rules help to ease children’s anxiety because they know what to expect. Instead of thinking about what is going to happen next, they can focus on trying new things and mastering new skills.
3. Assign chores and responsibilities. Every family member should contribute to the household, including children. This is how they internalize the idea that they are valuable.
4. Don’t do everything for your child. If you go running to fix every situation for your child, you are sending the message that you don’t believe they can do it themselves. We learn by making mistakes and your child misses out on an important lesson when you do it for them. We want them to experience success, of course, so we can try to structure situations so that they experience small successes and build on those to increase their skills.
5. Love them unconditionally. Your child must know that your love for them is not dependent on their talents or performance. Encourage them to continue trying. Avoid being critical and point out and praise their determination and improvements each time.
6. Ditch the labels. Stop calling your child “shy” or “quiet.” They may be a more sensitive child and slow to warm up, but when you excuse their behavior with labels it makes the label their identity and takes control away from them.
If you would like more information about how to improve your child’s self-esteem and confidence, please contact the offices of Dynamic Interventions at 661-257-1254 or at www.dynamicinterventions.net.
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