Advice Column

I came across an “advice column” recently in a newspaper. The person seeking advice wrote of a common problem: one spouse understands the need for estate planning, while the other spouse does not. I have taken the idea from the column, and incorporated what I commonly encounter as an estate planning and elder law attorney.
ADVICE NEEDED: I have been married to my husband for many years. I want to get our affairs in order, but my husband refuses. He argues that there isn’t a need. He thinks that he can just tell me what he wants, and that is good enough. I know it isn’t. I dealt with my parent’s illnesses and ultimate passing – so I know how important estate planning is. This conversation has been going on for several years. I am very hurt, frustrated, and resentful. I think he is being selfish and unloving to me and the kids. What should I do?
ADVICE GIVEN: Your husband may be afraid to face the idea of his own mortality. He wouldn’t be the first. The two of you need to make an appointment with an attorney who specializes in wills and estates. Living Trusts are important to avoid the expensive and time-consuming probate process. But also, he (and you) need Power of Attorney and Advance Health Care Directives in the event you and he are unable to speak for yourselves. Death is a fact of life, and hiding from it won’t make it go away. Just make the appointment – and tell him to go with you and “just listen”. If he doesn’t go, then you should get your own affairs in order without him.
For an appointment, call the McNamara Law Firm, PC at (661) 287-3260 or visit www.theMcNamaraLawFirm.com.