Is Anger Holding You Back In Life?

by | Feb 24, 2023 | Medical

Anger is indeed something we all experience, whether as an automatic reaction to something unpleasant or a result of unresolved trauma. But, despite its ubiquity, there are many layers of anger we may not fully understand or recognize.
Here’s a look at a few lesser-known facts about anger and its associated emotions so you can better understand and learn how to manage it.
Anger is a common automatic reaction to an unpleasant event or circumstance
One of the most important things to understand about anger is that it’s often an automatic reaction, meaning it’s not always rational or logical. In other words, we may not be able to control our initial reaction to feeling angry, but we can control how we react after that.
Powerlessness might be hiding beneath a self-protective shield of anger
When we experience powerlessness, we might feel at the mercy of other people or forces beyond our control. This can be a terrifying and frustrating feeling, but anger gives us a way to deflect attention away from our weaknesses.
Using anger as a shield, we might lash out or withdraw from others. Yet, underneath our outward display of anger, there is often a deep feeling of insecurity or inadequacy.
If you get angry frequently, it’s important to ask why. Are you mad at the person or thing you’re yelling at? Or are you trying to regain control or protect yourself from feeling vulnerable?
Remember that anger is often a secondary emotion – not the root cause of our problems but rather a symptom of something deeper going on within us.
Anger can be a result of unresolved trauma
For many people, anger is a response to feeling unsafe or threatened. For instance, growing up in a household where there was violence can lead to using anger to defend yourself. 
Anger can also be a way to avoid taking responsibility for your feelings and choices. After all, it seems easier to blame someone else for your problems than to deal with them head-on. But ultimately, this leads to more frustration and anger over time.
If you find yourself struggling with unexplained anger, it may be worth exploring whether there are any unresolved traumas in your past.
You Can Control Your Anger Before It Controls You
Sometimes, our anger can become uncontrollable, and it can impact our lives in negative ways. If you’re struggling with anger as a result of untreated anxiety, depression, or trauma, IOP can help! We’re now accepting enrollment for our upcoming Intensive Outpatient Services (IOP) at New U Therapy & Family Services. Our unique program can help people heal from depression, anxiety, and trauma without hospitalization. Reach out today to learn more! 

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