Divorce can be financially and emotionally devastating to a family. Statistics show that children of divorce are at increased risk of living in poverty. Twenty-eight percent (28 percent) of children living with a divorced mother live below the poverty line as compared to 19 percent of the general population. Before you consider taking your family over its fiscal cliff, try these tips to avoid it and strengthen your marriage:
Recognize and discuss your problems. While this brings obvious stress to the relationship, it is only fair that your partner be made aware certain issues are “deal breakers” or “marriage breakers” and they should be discussed as such. This is not about placing blame, but about trying to take corrective and family supportive action.
Seek the assistance of a counselor. Fortunately over the many years of my practice, the once taboo thought of seeing a therapist has eroded with the majority of educated people understanding the powerful and positive role counseling can play in a person’s and a couple’s lives. The therapist can help guide a couple through discussions to insure the dialogue is productive and more likely to be heard and understood.
Consider your own role in the dilemma. Oftentimes couples fall into unhealthy patterns that erode away at the foundation of their marriage. If you see these unhealthy patterns developing, take a moment to step back and consider a different way of reacting that may be more likely to change the direction and result of the historical pattern.
Focus more on the positive. Let’s face it, it’s not always a wonderful life. Recognize that, but do not let life’s trials cloud all that is good. Focusing on the good allows an opportunity for your spouse to demonstrate again all of the positive qualities and virtues that brought the two of you together in the commitment of marriage.
Unless or until you take action to nurture or save your marriage, you cannot divorce knowing that you have given it your all. Also, if divorce is inevitable, the couple who has tried to save their marriage tend to have a much less hostile view toward the divorce and the family has an increased potential of transitioning into post divorce life with dignity.
For more information about annulments and other family law matters, contact the Reape-Rickett Law Firm at 661-288-1000. They are located at 25152 Springfield Court, Suite 100 in Valencia.