2008 has been a year of challenges. We have struggled through adversity, been asked to check our morals, ethics and beliefs. Many have had their livelihoods and homes threatened, and many of us have had to realize that the status quo is not so solid and things change. But there is a great realization that is coming from this. It’s the realization that the people in your lives and the way you live your life are more important and more lasting than any material thing. That new realization is the “present” you can give yourself and everyone around you for Holiday 2008. In therapy we call it a change in perception. This season is the perfect time to look inside and ask yourself what all of this really means to you. Let all of the commercials, ads and expectations from others and of others go. Now try to decide what a “gift” really means to you. When you search for the perfect “present” to give someone think about what the people you love really need.
This is what I see come through my office door. Kids who say they want this toy or that toy, but all they really want is dad to come out and play with them for an hour. I have teens that pretend they don’t want to be around their parents, but all they really want is their parents to hear them, acknowledge them and understand them for just one instant. I have parents that crave to balance out their lives to spend more time with their families, yet they just can’t figure out how to do it. I have moms that just need one hour of time alone to regroup so that they can give back to their families all they need. I see people reaching out to change the world but not taking a moment to change themselves. I see people wanting true gifts — gifts that do not come in a box.
Holiday Season 2008 is an opportunity to see the people in your life and what gift would really bring them peace, happiness and joy. After all isn’t that what all of the cards say we want? Reach inside you and find what a “gift” means to you. A beautiful thing will happen. You will see the lights!
Happy Holidays from Shauna Hoffman MA, MFT and Compassionate Solutions. For more information, please call 661-714-5137.