College, Chocolate Cake, The Tampa Bay Buccaneers and the Infallibility of Attorneys
We attorneys have a clause in our retainer agreements which explains that while we may provide an opinion about your case, we do not provide a guaranty. In other words, we are not infallible. Here’s an example you are not likely to forget. In senior year of college, I was dating an “earthy-crunchy” girl from Rochester, NY. Rochester is a dismal land of cold and wet in the winter. Not exactly the New York City where I grew up. She, of course, dumped me and years later I ran into her in The City. I think I was a year or two out of law school. I had a bit of a God complex back then and stupidly viewed myself as King of the World.
Hoping to hear about the big mistake she made in dumping me, she instead told me she was moving back to Rochester and getting married. Her fiancé was in the “family business” up in Rochester. Jealous me thought, probably the used car business. How stupid could this girl possibly be in picking this clown over me?
Well, years went by. I was divorced and bored one day at work. It didn’t take me long to find Ms. Rochester on the internet. Seems she married one of the five “Glazer Brothers.” Their dad, Malcolm Glazer, was worth about 5 Billion (with a B) Dollars before he died some years back. He was the owner of both the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and the Manchester United Soccer team. Some “family business”, now owned by the five Glazer Brothers.
What about the chocolate cake? Ms. Rochester and I played “catch up” by phone. I explained that one of my greatest life’s experiences was in a hotel, being fed chocolate cake with a fork from room service by the love of my life. Never, had anyone done that for me. When I suggested she try it, she told me point blank that her husband was not going to like that. When I asked why, she said he was an “asparagus kind of guy”. She told me she was going to consider trying it with the asparagus. I have no idea how that worked out.
In any event, the next time that your attorney offers an opinion about your case, please think back to this article and remember. Used cars? Heck no. Tampa Bay Buccaneers! We attorneys are far from infallible. Is it me or is it time for Tom Brady to quit, who is with me?
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