We Hold the Key

This month Jews all around the world will celebrate the holiday of Rosh Hashanah, year 5783. During the first ten days of the new year, we engage in deep introspection on the past year, always striving to be our best. The blast of the shofar reminds us to leave our comfort zone, reflect, repair, and renew in areas that matter most to us. Upon reviewing our sometimes-painful relationships with loved ones, we feel as if we’re imprisoned and shackled by the hurt. To strengthen our relationships we must apologize, forgive, and receive forgiveness.
Apologizing is never easy. Forgiving is even harder. It doesn’t mean that the pain goes away or that we accept what happened, but it clears the air and creates an atmosphere of healing and peace. Whenever possible we ask for forgiveness in person, we acknowledge the wrongdoing, and hurtful words that might have been said, and promise not to repeat them.
For some people who cannot forgive in person, or choose to do it indirectly, writing a letter to the other person is one way. They express in writing exactly how they feel, imagining they’re in a cage of their resentment. They see the regrets and feel the sorrow of that person whom they’re asking for their forgiveness, realizing that that was the best they could’ve done with the knowledge they had at the time. Some pretend it’s a child asking for their forgiveness and have compassion for them. That act empowers them, and they no longer feel a victim.
We always grow and learn from our past mistakes since it takes courage to forgive, but it’s the secret to feeling joy and freedom. We choose to forgive mainly to unchain ourselves. We repair and renew so we can once again feel free to do what we love. Robin Casarjian wrote:” Forgiveness is a way of life that gradually transforms us from being helpless victims of our circumstances to being powerful and loving co-creators of our reality”.
Only we hold the key to unlock the door to our freedom and healing. We forgive ourselves for not healing the past and freeing ourselves from resentment and hurt feelings much sooner. At last, we move on looking ahead to the future with optimism, joy, and positive energy.
Wishing you all a happy Rosh Hashana and a wonderful new year!
Naomi Young is a published writer and multimedia artist. She’s been a bar/ bat mitzvah tutor and Jewish studies teacher in Santa Clarita for over 40 years. Contact her at naomiyoung7@yahoo.com. Visit her website www.naomiyoung.com.