Did you know that a scientific study found that actual spoken words account for only 7 percent of a communicated message? And that the tone used in saying those words account for another 38 percent? And what about the other 55 percent? That would be your body language.
As these statiastics show, communication involves more than words. As a matter of fact, words alone often convey the least amount of information during communication. For example, you say to your assistant, “You did a really great job on the Jones account.” If your tone when you say, “Really great job,” is enthusiastic, the message is positive. If your tone is sarcastic, the message becomes negative.
Now suppose you say, “You did a really great job.” Your tone is neutral with no sign of approval or disapproval, but you have a smile on your face. That smile would tell your assistant that the message is positive. A good way to improve your communications is to focus on your tone and your body language when addressing others. Because remember, it’s not what you say, it’s how you say.
One of the biggest complaints others have about us is that we don’t listen to them. Oh, we hear them, but are we actively listening? Have we put whatever we are doing on pause for them? Communication is a two-way street. Speaking is one way. Listening is the other. When listening, are you maintaining eye contact with the speaker or are you pre-occupied thinking about having to get to the bank before it closes? Are you acknowledging the speaker with your body language or distracted by neighboring conversations? If you are unclear about something, do you ask for clarification?
A good way to improve your communication is to focus on active listening. Because remember, it’s not what you heard, it’s how you listened.
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